Some things have not changed.....

Just before Cillian graced us with his appearance I wrote this post about how long it took me to get around. 

It's funny - as I was getting ready this morning - I was reminded of this post. 

I get up anywhere between 0400 and 0500 to start my morning routine and I am lucky if I am out the door by 0830, let alone dressed (in clothes that match and are free of puke, drool and wrinkles - latter being the least of my worries) , make up on, hair combed and mentally aware of where I am going.

My routine:

1. Wake up and feed kiwi (many times just laying there, both of us, staring at each other and having conversations that only a mom can have with her son).
2. Take a 30 minute shower (ok maybe not 30 minutes but it isn't a five minute shower)
3. Get partially dressed, wander around, drink some water, fix the hair, apply some make-up, wander more, get completely dressed, maybe wander more, fix the hair and maybe I am ready?
4. Nurse my lil man again - this time to sleep (which may take longer) again, just relishing every minute of his lil self before I head out into the wicked world of work.
5. Gather up my stuff, that I swore I put all in one place last night BUT then I remember I fell asleep nursing kiwi telling myself that I needed to get up when he was asleep.  (HA!)

Referring back to this post - it's so true - I was preparing for my lil man to take over my life.  A small sacrifice (losing my brain, mental capacity, ability to function and interact) to make for such a precious gift from God.

The BIG Separation

WELL - today had to come (as much as I was in denial) - and we bot survived. 

With that said - I owe a great deal to my hubby - who took care of my lil man. 

It took a lot to get out the door.  Sleep did not come easily last night not to mention lil man was cranky all weekend (as if he knew I was making the transition back to work - the other four letter word).

I have been having panic attacks for the past four weeks.  The reality (cause it really is true) is that I have a pretty awesome, fun, cutting edge job.  My hours are extremely flexible and I am fortunate to work with a great group of professionals. 

I still have to leave lil man, who was with me for nine + months and permanently attached to me 24/7 for the past 12 weeks. 

I was fortunate enough to meet my lil guy for lunch, still pumping twice and preventing the "bottle" for the first day back to work.  Tomorrow - he may have to bite the bottle (pun intended).  The thought of him taking my milk from a bottle makes me cry just typing this. 

I did manage to coordinate my outfit, put on make-up, comb my hair, escape without puke on me - and nursed my lil guy to sleep prior to leaving.  I seemed to roam around a great deal, often hitting the wrong button on the elevator to the floor I thought I might work on.  I hid out in the lab and cringed when the phone rang.  Luckily I kept busy getting things in order in the lab - but I did have to venture out a few times - shrieking back for fear anyone would recognize me.  One friend noted I was "skittish."  Embarrassed to say - social interactions in the past 12 weeks have been limited and all my insecurities have returned with a vengeance!

However, all the anxiety leading up to today, that filled my day, that sped my journey home - resulted in this look when I walked through the door.....

That says it all right there....   may have returned to work - but my lil man only has heart for only me! 

And I for him....

City travel

Yesterday I had lunch with my "boss" as I stare down the end of my maternity leave.

Kiwi came with. I don't know - maybe to plead his case on why mommy can't leave. (lol)

Yesterday was our first cold day with snow (don't get too excited - it was like a mm of snow).

No fear kiwi was snug as a bug in a rug OR a little elf in a pouch....

Yup that's how we roll in the city.

Operation Extraction day two

Today I had a lunch planned with my good friend and wanted to leave Kiwi at home (Ok - truth be told I did not WANT to leave him home, but I am told by my true friends I need to start separating and allowing my DH to watch him for more than 30 minutes.  Sigh - they are right, soon I will be making that long three block walk back to work and he needs to be able to hang with his daddy.) 

Off I went to my lunch (ok, again - not that easy!  I was supposed to meet Ms. B at 1130 - I walked in the restaurant at 1240.  Let's see, ten extra minutes in the shower cause I was seriously regretting leaving lil man; forgot how to put make up on since I haven't really worn any since I delivered; matching outfit was a bit difficult AND my hair do wasn't doing) and leaving lil man with my big man......

They look really happy don't right?????

As I left, I was quite ambivalent to be honest with you, but had trust in both my men that they would survive at least and hour.....

<<<Insert BIG SIGH>>>

I got to the restaurant - reunited with my BFF, and immediately felt out of my element.  I felt under dressed, mis-matched and socailly inept.

REALLY???

Hubby to the rescue - texting me 20 minutes into the lunch - kiwi went to sleep as soon as I left and was grinning in his swing while sleeping (dreaming of mama I am sure).

I am happy to say that I stayed, ate, enjoyed my BFF's company AND actually ended up staying for 2.5 hours away from my lil guy.

WOW

I returned home to find my dear daughter holding, rocking actually, kiwi, watching cartoons, wearing my shirt with kiwi snuggling tight to her - but happy NOT crying.  Better yet - they didn't break into my stash of breast milk (which - did I mention - there is about 2.5 L of in the freezer???  My dear hubby is worried my milk will eventually take over the freezer displacing the food.  It has certainly displaced the ice cubes.)

A successful extraction??????????

Yes and NO ----  I feel guilty I was gone that long but happy that my family was able to bond and successfully console him in my absence.  

He was clingy (and I am not complaining - I love that I am his main squeeze) for a few hours after that and then settled into our normal routine.  

As the time clock on my maternity leave ticks away, I feel a little less anxious about my return to the work force after today's outing.  

I will always miss my lil man (as I miss my daughters) but knowing that we can both survive a separation has calmed my nerves a bit. 

I love this

I have to agree with something in this video - that I really didn't realize until I was home with the baby.  I have a big ball I sit on at work the minimal times that I sit at my desk.  It helped my poster, hips and lower back.  But - sitting at home, nursing and recovering is not easy to do on a ball.  I noticed my hips, lower back and energy level was all going down hill quickly. 
 

I tried to take daily walks with kiwi in the moby wrap but we had a very wet and cool fall.  That did not entice me to get out and walk on days he was particularly fussy and needy or I was particularly tired. 
 

Now that I am feeling a bit more like my old self and kiwi is becoming a little more independent (aka - hanging with dad or sissy for more than five minutes without my presence) I have been regularly running.  That still doesn't take care of the issue of me sitting and nursing, sometimes for up to an hour depending on how needy he is. 

I wish there was a way to do this an nurse???

But, at the very least, I would like something like this at my desk at work. 

This Christmas Shop Homemade and American

  This Christmas take the pledge to shop homemade and American!  Click on the link above to sign the pledge.  

Reclaiming the morning

As the clock goes tick tick tick on my maternity leave, ripping my baby from my arms and me from him, we have been doing small things to ease back into work for both me and Kiwi. 

One of the things we have done is devote morning time to my hubby.  Many mornings I may be up and out the door by 0800 meaning prep time for work will take place while hubby is getting the girls up and out the door.  I have been giving up Kiwi (from my warm embrace) in the morning so that my hubby can balance him and the rest of the morning routine. 

In the past two weeks it has gone well.  He holds Kiwi (or one of the girls) and manages breakfast and girls out the door on time.  Kiwi has even begun the routine of napping till about 1130 every morning (and God help the person who interupts this time of napping for whatever reason other than booby time).

This morning was hillarious and my hubby handled it well.  

It went something like this.....

I nursed lil man all night with a final feeding somewhere around 0630ish.... 

Hubby was up and about somewhere around 0630ish....

Hubby takes Kiwi somewhere around 0645ish....

Hubby arouses the girls somewhere around 0700ish.....

Somewhere inbetween or around these two events he changes Kiwi and dresses him.....

Insert Glitch

Ro walks in and says (while I try to get some uninterrupted sleep) "dad's giving kekeboo a bath."

I respond - "ok sounds nice"  

Insert delayed thought process

Mom proceeds to climb out of bed "why in the blazes is he giving him a bath now"

Hubby trying to defuse the situation "all is well just go back to bed I'm on it."

Zombie mom (that's me) stumbling around trying to get breakfast for the girls to "help out" while hubby telling me to "go back to bed would you - I got this"

Insert crash, bang, boom, scatter

Mom just spilled the entire box of Corn Pops on the counter (see our cereal is on the absolute top shelf in our kitchen - why this hasn't happened before this is beyond me!  Why it had to happen today is even further beyond my grasp!)

Hubby starts yelling at zombie wife (that would be me) "for the love I GOT THIS - go back to bed now I have two messes to clean up."  

Zombie mom (that's me again), walking back to bed turns to say "what mess?"

Ro - "poop mom poop!  poop ALL OVER, from heel to head, knee to arm pit!"

Kiwi (sitting in bath tub) - coo, smile, coo, giggle, splashing water

Hubby - "it was beyond comprehension - just unbelievable a baby his size could make such a mess"

Zombie mom - ROFLMNBO "k - your on it - going to take my 'nap'"

Hubby - "don't worry about me - I got this - I am on it!  All is well!  Isn't it Kiwi?"

Kiwi - (sitting in bath tub) - coo, smile, coo, giggle, splashing water

Here is to my SAHD who handled all of this with aplumb:

1. Girls dressed, fed and off to school on time.
2. Kiwi bathed, dressed and down for his nap by 0800
3. Mom oblivious to how he did this (and that's a good place for mom to be)!

Kiwi's Santa Hat

I did it!  I got my creative juices flowing and developed a santa hat for Kiwi.  He, of course, was a part of the whole design process - enjoying the yarn craft like a true knitter to be. 

While I knit it he would try it on so I could make sure I was sizing the hat correctly.  I think he kinda looks like my lil elf here.  

I think at one point, if I could have handed him the needles he would have helped me knit.  Many times he would be sitting on my lap while I knit, using his feet to play with the yarn.  He is at the age that he is discovering all his body parts and fascinated by how they work.  He would sit for many minutes trying to manipulate the yarn with his toes and feet.  Occasionally he would wrap his hands around the yarn as well.  All the time cooing and smiling. 


The end result was a hat I was happy with but a pattern that alluded me.  I wish I had written while I knit - but multi-tasking also still alludes me. 

I am now working on a hat for my older daughter so I am tweaking the pattern.  My first real pattern I am kinda proud of.

It was after 0100 when I finally finished the hat, details and all, and kiwi was knocked out.

He modeled without protest but the best picture I could get was these two.  I think he looks like the best Christmas present ever!

He wore it to the One of a Kind show today.  He quickly became the center of attention.  Eventually we took the hat off because it was causing too much attention and waking him up.  He was snuggled in the moby wrap sleeping soundly.  That was soon disrupted and so was our tour of the show.

Regardless - he likes his hat and now I am rushing to get two more done for my girls for our Christmas pictures to go on the Christmas cards I have yet to order. 


Let the Christmas festivities begin!  I am back in my knitting groove. 

Operation Extraction Day One

Hear that sound.... shhhhhh... listen closely......  (tick tick tick tick)

What's that sound?

My maternity leave ticking away!!!!!!

Like sands through the hour glass so are the days left on my maternity leave (oh how I wish I was in the UK).

In heeding  the advice of my dear friends, who have listened to my concerns over returning to work or experiencing my panic attacks with me, I have begun the extraction of my lil man from my 24/7 presence (insert sob here).

I needed to run an errand (a small one - but knew I could get it done quicker than strapping Kiwi in my wrap and walking) and Natalie stepped up and watched Cillian for me.  Of course - she had help from her lil sissy - Rowan. 

Off I went, texting a few times (till she told me to stop all was well she would contact me if needed), and took care of my errand. 

Total time gone - barely an hour - but it seemed like 8 hours. 

I returned home to Kiwi playing with the girls, happy and cooing. 

Funny - when I walked in - lil man took one look in my direction, pouted, and started to cry till I was holding him in my arms (not nursing, just holding). 

It's a good thing - only in the eyes of me.  My friends would say he needs less of me right now or my return to work will be rough for all involved.......

I'm struggling here - but know they are right (and praying fervently that God will give me strength!)

Running again.... it's about time!

I took a few weeks off from running for multiple reasons. 

The weather was stinky - rainy, cold, windy and just plain ick.  Not something I wanted to expose lil man to.

I was also feeling a little run down.  At the advice of my NMW I did more walking with him in the moby wrap and yoga at home with Kiwi.

Today, I was ready to get back into running.

Nat and I started back with week two of C25K program and Kiwi came along.  As you can tell he was dressed for the trip and ready to cheer us on. 

As it turns out, the walk segments he hates.  He will fuss until we start running.  Could it be I have a lil coach just screaming to be heard?

Then again, I did run up till about 28 WGA then walked, maybe he just remembers all the movement and enjoyed it in the jogger??

It feels good to be getting back into the grove of running, hopefully the weather will hold out for us for a few weeks to get into a habit.  Kiwi certainly loves the time out....

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

This year, unlike years before, we traveled to Michigan for Thanksgiving!  We literally packed up our house (kitchen stuff, bed stuff, baby stuff and other stuff) and took the four hour (plus) trek to my hubby's dad.  Not something one should do with a child less than 3 months old (or in reality less than a year) but it was something we needed to do as a family.   

(insert pout from me - but before you judge me - understand it was my idea to travel to Michigan).

My hubby's mom died a year ago and this is his dad's second Thanksgiving alone.  Let alone, there was a new grandson in his life, the need to go home was there.  It was my suggestion since I was on maternity leave and his dad would never travel to Chicago (that's another long story for another time). 

My hubby is ALL ABOUT cooking on Thanksgiving and was not giving that up even by traveling home.  So - the trek was made, the dinner was prepared and family time was had by all. 

I would like to squash my sarcastic stories, pouty moments, frustration and irritation by pointing out what I (we as a family) were thankful for this year (Cause the former was expressed in, text messages to my friends, twitter and facebook - and serves no purpose here.)

This year was a year of God's faithfulness to all that was heavy in our heart as a family.  Natalie had a successful year in 7th grade and ending with straight A's and more confidence in herself.  Rowan grew socially by leaps and bounds and tackled some difficult life decisions well, seeking prayer first (something I need to do a lil more).  My hubby tackled a personal goal and ushered in something very heavy on his heart - a son (such a blessing from God).  I had a wonderfully complication free pregnancy which resulted in a perfect, healthy baby boy (Thank you Jesus) that was such a testament of God's Grace, Mercy and Faithfulness to many of my friends.   All of this occurred stress free (well relatively stress free) during and because of tremendous support from some awesome friends in our life!

From a more worldly point of view - my career advanced (with a raise), my hubby is back at the bike shop working regularly (and happy with this career) and the girls are thriving and striving in Chicago. 

So on this evening of gluttony and football greatness.......

Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!

Wishing upon a star.....

If I could ever get my brain started again - My KnitPicks wish list

5x7 Folded Card

Baby Blocks Boy Birth Announcement

Customize your own unique baby announcements with Shutterfly.

View the entire collection of cards.

Congratulations to my man!!!

 It started about nine months ago (hmmmmm) and today came to fruition - my hubby running the Chicago Marathon!!!!!!

Let me start at the beginning - we (as in my hubby and I) pledged to run the marathon TOGETHER as a part of our Church's pledge to support World Vision. 

When it came time to sign up - I was feeling "under the weather" and maybe just maybe thought (hoped) I might be (was) pregnant.  Needless to say - my hubby signed up and I did not (unbeknownst to him - the real reason why I did not).

Norm trained, was encouraged by us and our prayers for an injury free running season, and raised money (many of you supported him - and thank you!)

Today - we as a family - were there to see him through to the finish line!  And when I mean "we" I mean Rowan, Natalie and Kiwi (less than two weeks old mind you - meaning I was less than two weeks post partum.  A miracle in and of itself). 

We waited at various pit stops on the 26.2 mile course - with his favorite at Clark street - to cheer him on with signs, high fives and a hug from me/kiss from Kiwi.




Watching our man progress through the race was so much fun (and tiring)!  We were not alone (crowded it was with other family and friends rooting others along)!

The smile on our face had us pushing on to the next pit stop and eventually to the finish line!

Girls Solo Trip - out and about

The girls have been bugging me to take their lil brother out for a walk.  We got the stroller out (here is my caveat - I do not believe in strollers.  I actually hate them.  The baby is so much happier near you, being held by you, hearing your heart beat and smelling you.  Flame away) that was generously given to us by a dear friend. 

It's an Uppa stroller - the cadillac of strollers as I understand.  To me it looks like a Pram - and somehow a Pram is much better than a stroller. 

I had nursed him asleep and he was bundled up and set.  The girls wanted to walk around the block, as if they were "Babysitting" with mama out of the picture. 

I took a deep breath, instructed them to stay on the sidewalk, no crossing streets, no crazy speeds and avoidance of bumps.

I also made the swear they would get along AND carry their cell phones. 

I wish I could say my girls got along, apparently there was a power struggle on who would push and who would wave.....

But in the end - they had a blast wheeling Kiwi around in the Pram and gave mom a few minutes of silence.

Oddly - I felt out of place without my lil man.  Upon their return, despite the fact he was still snoozing, I scooped him up to snuggle with till he woke for his next feeding.

Life does not get better than this........

Out for a walk

Today we ventured out for a walk - using the moby wrap for the first time - and strolled about a mile or so before coming home.  It felt great, thank goodness for yoga pants, and gave me a burst of energy I was desperately needing after the all day nursing marathon. 

We ran into some friends while we were out and stopped to talk for a while.

I must have left my brain at the hospital, I wish they would call and let me know that they found it, because it was all I could do to answer yes and no questions. 

I think, looking at the photo, I look like I'm in a fog. 

The truth, I am completely and utterly enamored in my lil guy as he has me wrapped around his little finger.

Praise God for wonderful weather, the city we live in and his ever faithfulness to what is heavy in our hearts. 

Official Pictures - aka Kiwi's Modeling Debut

The official pictures were taken yesterday, at the hospital, and I started crying as soon as I saw them.

  The pictures taken at the hospital have come a long way.

It's hard to believe that they were one step below school pictures when you see what they have evolved to.

And, in my opinion, it was a long time coming.

Better yet - they are digital!

Woot - wish school pictures were digital to expedite the order, improve the picture you get and make it possible for you to order AFTER the picture is taken.

So - the long and short of it - since I apparently dropped my brain in the delivery room and no one has found it yet - our baby boy is beautiful and the perfect gift from God.

It's a BOY!

After 18 plus hours (more than that actually but we fibbed a little to take the pressure off my normally long labors) Cillian Edward Mobley made his appearance into this world!

Cillian Edward Mobley at 2135 on 9/202011

In the words of my husband, with that final push, "it's a boy - and he's perfect!"

Perfect indeed he is!

Weighing in at 4.012 KG he every gram a boy!

We were blessed by a wonderful mid-wife, a great tag team of two doulas and a caring primary nurse.  The girls were there for the entire labor and in the end Natalie became the rock that got me through transition and to completion (while she will lead you to believe that her hand is still numb from my squeezing).  

I don't think this is something that any of us will forget for a long time.

Praise God for his continued Grace and Mercy

Things that take me longer these days

After having a conversation with someone today, where I was questioned how long it took me to get ready and around "these days" (not that the person was prying they were actually trying to prevent me from coming in to work when I could have worked from home), I realized that my days of popping out of bed and heading out the door were no more.

Where did they go?  I'm pregnant - not a cripple!  I reviewed what my morning routine entails and I was appalled with the major time sucks:

1. I wake up anywhere between 0400 and 0500, wide awake, relishing in my baby's movements - sometimes as if he or she is running a marathon in there.  
2. My morning showers are a luxury to me.  I am in there for many more minutes, wasting water, than I need to be.  BUT, it wakes me up, soothes the baby (who is up and at it at 0500), and relaxes me.
3. I wander from room to room getting ready.  I used to pop out of the shower, get dressed, put the make up on and blow dry the hair.  I now find myself getting half way dressed, fix the hair, put some make up on, finish fixing the hair, maybe get finished getting dressed... lets not forget all the stops for a glass of water, lingering on GMA or just plain laying back feeling the baby move.
4. I am fragmented in my thought process (as if #2 pointed this out) and as much as I think I have my stuff together the night before (ha ha), I find it scattered all over.  Like getting ready in the AM, I wander from room to room, sometimes leaving the object I retrieved from the other room in the room I just retrieved another object.  
5. Mentally - I am just not prepared to leave the house.  Laying back, feet up, feeling the baby move, reading a book and chilling - is what my mind set is these days.

 All of this is good - considering the time to when this baby shows up is winding down (minutes, hours, days... not weeks) - I imagine this is a natural part of the nesting syndrome preparing me for the blissful (sleep deprived) days of a newborn.

I HEART PREGNANCY

Another Miracle

As many of you know, the baby was discovered to be Breech (leading me to believe that this lil guy is a guy cause a girl would stop and ask for directions on the proper way out) last week leaving us with choices that were not on my list of delivery options. 

Today - at the bright hour of 0800 - my hubby and prego self trek'd on down to the OB unit at the hospital for an external version.  I had tried to prepare myself for a crash c-section, successful version but induced labor or worse - a planned c-section d/t failed version.  (A granola nut tree hugging woman like me with two water births under her belt and a combined total of 4 years of breast feeding was not digging these options). 

There was a great deal of prayer going on in my house this weekend not to mention breech exercises and some humor provided by my girls.  At one point I was laying with my feet in the air, on my bed, in the privacy (insert British accent) of my room, with Peter Gabriel playing at the pubic area and me massaging the baby towards the head down position, and in walked my lil Ro with her minions to stare at me.  I heard one minion say "what's you mom doing" to which my reply was "trying to flip the baby - Rowan - please leave and shut the door." 

The girls drew lovely lil arrows on my belly directing the baby to the head down position along with hearts and flowers and notes of love (this was the most wonderful thing they could have done to support me than anything else).  

My hubby tried to do his best to support me but I could tell he was struggling to understand all that was concerning and upsetting to me (bless his heart).

 We even did the casting of my belly - for fear that this would be the last weekend it was mommy and baby as opposed to mom and baby "insert girl or boy."   I spent several alone minutes rubbing the belly, talking to my baby and praying I could give up control to God and relax. 

We took many bump pictures and resolved ourselves that this was the last night as a family expecting. 

Which brings me to this morning......

What's that you ask?????

That's a head - yup a head!

PRAISE GOD - a beautiful head in the HEAD DOWN position!

Did I mention this was BEFORE the version?

Yup - BEFORE the version!

this baby - smarter than you can imagine - by the Grace of God - flipped.  He (or she) FLIPPED on his (or her) own!!!!

Ok, this is where I tell you that I:

a. didn't believe it and asked for three different US looks

b. knew exactly when it happened after it was confimred

and.....

c.  CRIED - tears of joy, tears of faith and tears of anxiety leaving my body

Praise God for his continued Grace, Faithfulness and Control 

Pregnant woman in the mosh pit!

Tonight I relived my childhood and baptized my baby (in utero no less) to my most favorite Band and Artist. 

I was 14 years old when I was in my first mosh pit at a U2 concert in Florida.  It was an incredible experience!

I am happy to say - tonight topped that experience.


U2's 360 tour returned to Chicago and my good friend Melinda, and her twin boys, (who attend North Park) stood outside (okay maybe we sat) Soldier Field in the hot sun (okay maybe prego here sat in the shade) in order to gain general access and PIT location.

We - (so smart we were) - ordered Jimmy Johns while standing (sitting) in the line for general admission.  

We succeeded and my lil guy (or girl) was totally immersed in U2 goodness. 

 It was hot!

It was crowded!

The concert did not start until 2030!!

I stood 80% of that time!!!!

But it was so worth it to see this!!!

To be this close, to take these pictures (mostly with my iphone) and to immerse my pregnant self in this was just the best.

Enjoying this with my friend and her sons - Priceless!!!

We were on the side of Edge - (priceless) with a clear shot of Larry Mullins

 

 Adam - such a great performer.....

I never noted this in any of the other concerts I have attended (and I have gone to every one of U2's tours - (EVEN POP MART)

Their music has evolved and matured much as the band members have.  I have enjoyed the journey as many other fans have, and so glad I was able to attend this concert (in which I purchased tickets for two years earlier but d/t an accident by Bono - a delay of two years made us wait.  I had no idea I would be prego at the time - believe me NO IDEA).

All in all - this event is one for the baby book (pre-birth) and one for my blog.

It's really quite silly.... or not

Today was the US!  The one day that most prego women can't wait for.  I was really quite underwhelmed by it all.  This is our third baby and I am just thankful that this gift from God is growing inside of me. 

To say I was a little stressed about getting the US done is an understatement.  I didn't even know how stressed until the warm gel hit the belly and the probe made contact.  It's such a hard sell now for all these screenings, amnios, US and genetic work ups.  My hubby and I went into this pregnancy praising God for the opportunity to be parents again and felt very strongly that whatever God gave us was what God wanted.  A screening result would not have changed anything in the course of our pregnancy. 

As soon as the probe made contact with the belly I started crying.  Not tearing up, CRYING.  A fountain of tears came pouring out.  Poor US tech thought I was uncomfortable from the US and my overly full bladder (which I then got to empty). 

What caused this outpouring of tears - the most amazing, beautiful, sight that I could have laid eyes on

 

A beautiful, perfectly created, baby.  A four chambered heart, perfect head circumference, abdominal organs all intact, spinal cord complete, two arms and two legs measuring right at the dates estimated (not too big not too small).  He/she even did acrobatic moves while being filmed.  

Tears of Joy, Tears of Stress - but most of all Tears of Praise that God once again shows his hand in our lives in such a small, yet so big, way!

PRAISE GOD!!

Happy Mother's Day!

Today was a very low keyed Mother's Day.  I tried to keep it low key as my husband is still mourning the loss of his mom over a year ago. 

To me - the greatest Gift from God was my girls and the most recent gift of my pregnancy. 

I could ask for nothing more.

Today - pleasantly surprised - the girls came home from their social outing to tell us they were joining us for Church because:

1. They didn't want to miss Church
2. It's mom's day

While I was shocked and thought that they would be exhausted it was also quite an honor to have Natalie, my oldest, join me in church today.  Her youth group, which meets on Sunday at 0900, does not meet at the 1100 service so her place was with us.  It was a very special treat.  (And a huge show of where she is in her Christian Faith walk.)

For dinner we had grilled beets, asparagus and caprese salad.  YUM  Ok - there was a crock pot full of spare ribs but I just can't tolerate meat, still.  But - the veggies hit a home run! 

For desert Rowan (my sidekick) and I walked briskly to Trader Joes to get a flourless chocolate cake and malt ball cookies. 

Now - I want to chill out, knit and try to mentally prep myself for the beginning of the work week.....

Sigh.....

For now it's good to reflect on the gift of motherhood that I am so very thankful for!

Praise God!

Park Message today - Why do we work?

The girls - with their social life that I live vicariously through - are at a sleepover tonight.  The dear hubby and I had a date night.  He suffered through a night with his prego wife who had strange food aversions such as "nothing that is edible tastes good or looks good." 

We used our Groupon coupon to Barrio and decided we were glad it was a groupon coupon.  Sigh - while the food was different and they gave nice little portions, the service lacked a lot!  I had the opportunity to visit the bathroom (d/t the pea size of my bladder that the silly baby seems to think is his water bed) three times from appetizer to desert and wished I had before we left.  That was how long dinner dragged out.  Perhaps God was trying to get us to enjoy the time alone together - all a part of his master plan that we totally ignored. 

We came home to look over the Message from Park Church for Sunday, knowing we would enjoy the service to ourselves with our kids away.

I really liked this short theme - it has me thinking deeply about what work means to me.  I wish I could say I enter every work week with a renewed sense of purpose but find myself longing for something better as soon as I am five minutes into the Monday work day.  While work does give me a sense of purpose and I enjoy what I do - minor (and some major things) often irritate me so that I am not who I should be.  Sigh - I have a lot of work to do on this front. 

Ecclesiastes 1:3 :: Your Work Matters to God, Pt. 2

Ecclesiastes 1:3 ESV
What does man gain by all the toil at which he toils under the sun?

Ecclesiastes 2:10-11 :: Your Work Matters to God

Ecclesiastes 2:10-11 ESV
And whatever my eyes desired I did not keep from them. I kept my heart from no pleasure, for my heart found pleasure in all my toil, and this was my reward for all my toil. Then I considered all that my hands had done and the toil I had expended in doing it, and behold, all was vanity and a striving after wind, and there was nothing to be gained under the sun.

What does work mean for you?   

The Bump!

Have I mentioned I LOVE being pregnant!  Just the thought that I am mylenating and gestating fills my life with joy.  To feel that lil guy moving just adds to that.

I am on the cusp of 20 weeks - a time when you can breath a little easier, sit back, feel the baby move daily and know that it's a cake walk from here on out.

So happy I am prego but so not happy with people asking me when I am going to look prego.  So - here is my BUMP at the cusp of 20wga.  There is a bump!

PRAISE GOD!!!!!!!

What is the MAJOR reason you work?

Today's Message at Park was utterly profound yet so basic and simple. 

Genesis 1:28 ESV

And God blessed them. And God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth."

I've never been the "lazy" person at work.  I might go through seasons where I feel blah about work but I always try to put my best work forward.  I don't think of work as an idol but after today's message I have to think twice about how I work.  I rarely have a "sabbath."  Rarely.  I am always checking email, even if it is just for personal emails.  You know how that ends up - you look for personal emails and then there is an email from work and you just have to read and possibly answer.  Then there are the charts I must go through, and often times, go in on the weekend to gather.  I always feel like things need to be done now, as opposed to later, well as opposed to just done and turned in and I always feel like I need to look for new things to tackle or improve.





I need to make a few changes in my life - which perhaps - would make me happier about my job, a better mom, a better wife and in turn a better woman of God.

1. I need to keep a sabbath - totally disconnect from my email/twitter/FB and VPN access to work?
2. I need to not push the envelope of time at work - do what's reasonably expected of someone within a normal work week and stop bringing work home, checking email at dinner and working on "work" at the dinner table.  
3. I need to learn to say "no" at work.  (I am not the only one that can do a task and do it well)
4. I need to give my career over to God.
   

At the end of the service there was a CHALLENGE  -  One sentence mission statement for MAKING YOUR WORK WORSHIP Just one sentence to summarize what you want to see happen in your life.

I have thought about it all day, and while I was going through charts as well, and came up with this.

I want to make an impact at work from the skills and calling that God has given me while showing my co-workers, and others I come into contact with, Christ's Love.

So what is the MAJOR reason YOU Work?

What I am reading now.....

Finished Green - interesting.  Not as good as the first three books in the series but definitely worth the read. 

I am now reading Radical by David Platt.

This has shown up on many blog posts and other relative media that I decided it was a subtle nudge I should start reading it.


With a point, click and download - this is the book I will curl up with tonight.  While I am concerned it maybe a little in my face about how the Worldly Culture of today is interfering with how we should be seeing, viewing, believing and following God....

I think I need an in your face talk....

Eco Easter Egg Decor

Today the girls dabbled in the Easter Art of "Egg Dying."  I have always hated Egg dying because it seems as if the eggs always have minute cracks and the dye seeps in contaminating the eggs.  I know that PAAS is supposed to be safe but it just never seemed "RIGHT."

Rowan found this at WholeFoods last week when we were off buying groceries.

The first thought that crossed my mind was "How Brilliant" (insert Brittish accent) and the second thought was how expensive?

I know that sounds jaded but, in general, organic, non-toxic, green, natural, eco-freindly products tend to have a higher price tag.

We were pleasantly surprised by the relatively equivalent price to the PAAS and factored in the
 cost of the eggs that we would have to trash because the unfriendly ECO dye would have created
 meant that we were actually getting a better bargain for the price.

I just loved the packaging as well.  I am a big sucker for packaging.  It kind of goes with whole - presentation is everything.  Make it look good, organized, cute, adorable, professional, shiny, etc you can pretty much have a less than perfect product.

So - as we opened the cute dye kit we wondered - would it stand up to the cuteness and create safe adorable colored eggs??????

It got two thumbs up from the girls......

The only downside is that amount of time it takes for each egg to be dyed.

In this age of instant gratification we want everything to take mere minutes.  In order for the eggs to shine their brightest they needed

As little as 10 minutes in the dye and up to 20 minutes for some of the colors.

So - they read between each plop of the egg.....

The really cool thing was the color card that had them experimenting with how long, which cross dye and wiping the egg for special effects.......

The finished product?????

Turned out quite nice if Rowan does say so herself......

Happy Easter!!!

Christ is Risen!!

What I am reading now.....

I am officially back into Ted Dekker - I don't think I ever left his book club but did take a respite.  Showdown, while at times dragged a bit under the narrative chatter, was engaging and entertaining as well as fulfilling for a Spring Break Week.  I have now started this book - one I downloaded a while ago but never got around to reading.....

While Spring Break is officially over for me - back at work et al, with all the chaos and uncertainty going on around work, I have decided to try to make my evenings the most relaxing as I can (after all I am mylenating and gestating). So here I sit with my newly downloaded book, four chapters in and, sigh, I remember the circle series but forgot so much. I really hate books that keep reiterating what you already read in a previous book, but this time I find myself grateful.

I predict this book will be devoured over the weekend as my last book for Spring Break.

NMW update

Today Rowan attended my NMW appointment with me.  It was an honor to have her join me at the appointment. 

It appears that pregnancy agrees with me......

Total weight gain since start of pregnancy I have gained a total of 7 pounds with an initial wt loss of 4 pounds.  So + 3.  (not that I am counting - I can run all I want after the baby is born)

Vitals -
HR 60
BP 100/60
RR 24 (ok I'm a bit of a retainer right now)

Rowan was able to hear the FHTs and was fascinated by all the NMW does in comparison to a doctor's visit.  She was struck mostly by the fact they "listen" and gave me a huge opportunity to ask as many questions as I wanted. 

The most interesting thing she liked was the Leopold's maneuver which apparently revealed I am measuring three weeks higher than I should be.  I could have told her the baby was high - but why my bladder still feels squished I'll never know.  I can barely run/walk a mile before I need to search for a port-a-potty and that's with a bathroom break prior to my workout. 

Two things you don't want to hear at your check up.  "well either your baby is 'BIG' or you might have two in there." 

REALLY?

I'm not questioning this beautiful gift that God gave us - but really?  I know that sometimes he does give us more than we think we can handle because he wants us to rely on him...  but twins? 

I guess the only thing left to say is - "Praise God" for a healthy pregnancy that seems to agree with me!

Sad day in Holland

This week we took a trip to Holland, MI.  We love it there.  It's such a cute lil college town with tons of biking lanes/paths and five biking stores.  There are two knitting stores and a really quaint coffee shop that we would hang at every morning and evening. 

This year - we were saddened by the Magic Treehouse bookstore joining the long trend of indie book stores closing. 

We walked up and down the street, cobble stone sidewalks et al, looking for the book store only to come to the place where the Treehouse bookstore used to be.  Yes, USED to be.  Apparently it closed last August. 

The girls and I were bummed.  We were looking forward to picking out a book to read during the torrential down pours, snow, sleet, hail and ice storms we were plagued by.

SIGH

I own a Kindle, an IPod and a Nook color.  I hope to, some day, own an ipad (holding out for generation 4).  I enjoy reading on those devices and so does my one daughter and husband.  HOWEVER, this does not dismiss the advantages of walking into a book store, walking the aisles, reviewing the titles and taking in the smell of new books.  

I live to find an indie bookstore, search the shelves, find a book that peaks my interest and hang out reading it in the local coffee shop.  This is a trait I have passed on to my daughters.  It's as satisfying, as if not more, than finding the LYS in a town we are visiting and getting a skein of sock yarn to "knit a sock from that town."  

A friend lamented it was the sign of the times, economy and ebooks, but I think it's our priorities and shift in decisions we make that have led to the rapid demise of our local indie book stores. 

What I am casting on....

Of course I brought knitting with me....  What knitter doesn't take knitting on vaca with them?

But of course, I had to stop at the LYS (which I was so happy to see) to find out if anything peaked my interest....

And of course it did.....

Berroco Origami....  I haven't seen it out yet and read a wonderful review of it by Yarn Harlot last year.

It was used in a pattern that a friend of mine was looking at as a Spring yarn substitution for a shrug to knit in the fall.





Of course...  instant gratification...  I had to have it and had to cast on the wonderful new find.

The Sea and Sky Shrug which was in the Interweave Knitting Fall 2010 Magazine.

The knitting store was oh so happy to wind the yarn while I went next door to the "baby" store (insert big smile here for the prego mama on vacation) to stimulate their economy as well.

After we got back to our hotel - I sent the kids off with dad to swim and play as I started the cast on for this wonderful new project I just HAD to start....

Sorry Rowan - your first sock is almost done, but, on hold right now.....


Now it feels like spring break.... nevermind the 30 degree temps, the weather changes from snow, ice, sleet, hail and now tornado warning that has plagued us all day.....

I am happy with my knitting and DOWN TIME

Praise God!