After several failed attempts at reviving a blogging life I have decided to launch another attempt. I actually am motivated to blog. I have been given the opportunity to pursue a new avenue in my current career. I am not sure why I am so apprehensive given my unceasing prayer for such an opportunity to appear in my life. Instead of having faith this is a door God is opening I need the certainty of man this is a door that I should walk through. Stupid - right? But I also know if a door opens another one closes. The question is - what door will close.
I have spent the past few weeks braving the cold running, praying and knitting - which is somewhat redundant since I pray when I run and when I knit. During this week off my husband and I have decided to abandon our hopes of another child and pursue my new career opportunity. While I am at peace with this I feel a twinge of pain that what has been heavy on my heart for the last five years will not come to fruition. I know that I am blessed with my two beautiful girls and praise God for everything he has done in my life and know that he knows the depths of my heart and will provide whatever comfort I seek. I also know, internally, I had honestly given up back in October when all the "fertility" stuff went in the sharps box at work.
So I start this blog with a sense of freedom, a sense of renewal and a sense of hope. I know that God has a plan for us and I merely need to rely on him to guide our steps here forward. This does not mean I won't run, pray and knit! I find this is when I am most balanced and walking in the direction I need to.
So join me on my blog as I place my hope in Christ alone. I know he has a plan for me, my family and the lives we touch.
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