Operation Extraction day two

Today I had a lunch planned with my good friend and wanted to leave Kiwi at home (Ok - truth be told I did not WANT to leave him home, but I am told by my true friends I need to start separating and allowing my DH to watch him for more than 30 minutes.  Sigh - they are right, soon I will be making that long three block walk back to work and he needs to be able to hang with his daddy.) 

Off I went to my lunch (ok, again - not that easy!  I was supposed to meet Ms. B at 1130 - I walked in the restaurant at 1240.  Let's see, ten extra minutes in the shower cause I was seriously regretting leaving lil man; forgot how to put make up on since I haven't really worn any since I delivered; matching outfit was a bit difficult AND my hair do wasn't doing) and leaving lil man with my big man......

They look really happy don't right?????

As I left, I was quite ambivalent to be honest with you, but had trust in both my men that they would survive at least and hour.....

<<<Insert BIG SIGH>>>

I got to the restaurant - reunited with my BFF, and immediately felt out of my element.  I felt under dressed, mis-matched and socailly inept.

REALLY???

Hubby to the rescue - texting me 20 minutes into the lunch - kiwi went to sleep as soon as I left and was grinning in his swing while sleeping (dreaming of mama I am sure).

I am happy to say that I stayed, ate, enjoyed my BFF's company AND actually ended up staying for 2.5 hours away from my lil guy.

WOW

I returned home to find my dear daughter holding, rocking actually, kiwi, watching cartoons, wearing my shirt with kiwi snuggling tight to her - but happy NOT crying.  Better yet - they didn't break into my stash of breast milk (which - did I mention - there is about 2.5 L of in the freezer???  My dear hubby is worried my milk will eventually take over the freezer displacing the food.  It has certainly displaced the ice cubes.)

A successful extraction??????????

Yes and NO ----  I feel guilty I was gone that long but happy that my family was able to bond and successfully console him in my absence.  

He was clingy (and I am not complaining - I love that I am his main squeeze) for a few hours after that and then settled into our normal routine.  

As the time clock on my maternity leave ticks away, I feel a little less anxious about my return to the work force after today's outing.  

I will always miss my lil man (as I miss my daughters) but knowing that we can both survive a separation has calmed my nerves a bit. 

Operation Extraction Day One

Hear that sound.... shhhhhh... listen closely......  (tick tick tick tick)

What's that sound?

My maternity leave ticking away!!!!!!

Like sands through the hour glass so are the days left on my maternity leave (oh how I wish I was in the UK).

In heeding  the advice of my dear friends, who have listened to my concerns over returning to work or experiencing my panic attacks with me, I have begun the extraction of my lil man from my 24/7 presence (insert sob here).

I needed to run an errand (a small one - but knew I could get it done quicker than strapping Kiwi in my wrap and walking) and Natalie stepped up and watched Cillian for me.  Of course - she had help from her lil sissy - Rowan. 

Off I went, texting a few times (till she told me to stop all was well she would contact me if needed), and took care of my errand. 

Total time gone - barely an hour - but it seemed like 8 hours. 

I returned home to Kiwi playing with the girls, happy and cooing. 

Funny - when I walked in - lil man took one look in my direction, pouted, and started to cry till I was holding him in my arms (not nursing, just holding). 

It's a good thing - only in the eyes of me.  My friends would say he needs less of me right now or my return to work will be rough for all involved.......

I'm struggling here - but know they are right (and praying fervently that God will give me strength!)

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

This year, unlike years before, we traveled to Michigan for Thanksgiving!  We literally packed up our house (kitchen stuff, bed stuff, baby stuff and other stuff) and took the four hour (plus) trek to my hubby's dad.  Not something one should do with a child less than 3 months old (or in reality less than a year) but it was something we needed to do as a family.   

(insert pout from me - but before you judge me - understand it was my idea to travel to Michigan).

My hubby's mom died a year ago and this is his dad's second Thanksgiving alone.  Let alone, there was a new grandson in his life, the need to go home was there.  It was my suggestion since I was on maternity leave and his dad would never travel to Chicago (that's another long story for another time). 

My hubby is ALL ABOUT cooking on Thanksgiving and was not giving that up even by traveling home.  So - the trek was made, the dinner was prepared and family time was had by all. 

I would like to squash my sarcastic stories, pouty moments, frustration and irritation by pointing out what I (we as a family) were thankful for this year (Cause the former was expressed in, text messages to my friends, twitter and facebook - and serves no purpose here.)

This year was a year of God's faithfulness to all that was heavy in our heart as a family.  Natalie had a successful year in 7th grade and ending with straight A's and more confidence in herself.  Rowan grew socially by leaps and bounds and tackled some difficult life decisions well, seeking prayer first (something I need to do a lil more).  My hubby tackled a personal goal and ushered in something very heavy on his heart - a son (such a blessing from God).  I had a wonderfully complication free pregnancy which resulted in a perfect, healthy baby boy (Thank you Jesus) that was such a testament of God's Grace, Mercy and Faithfulness to many of my friends.   All of this occurred stress free (well relatively stress free) during and because of tremendous support from some awesome friends in our life!

From a more worldly point of view - my career advanced (with a raise), my hubby is back at the bike shop working regularly (and happy with this career) and the girls are thriving and striving in Chicago. 

So on this evening of gluttony and football greatness.......

Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!

Congratulations to my man!!!

 It started about nine months ago (hmmmmm) and today came to fruition - my hubby running the Chicago Marathon!!!!!!

Let me start at the beginning - we (as in my hubby and I) pledged to run the marathon TOGETHER as a part of our Church's pledge to support World Vision. 

When it came time to sign up - I was feeling "under the weather" and maybe just maybe thought (hoped) I might be (was) pregnant.  Needless to say - my hubby signed up and I did not (unbeknownst to him - the real reason why I did not).

Norm trained, was encouraged by us and our prayers for an injury free running season, and raised money (many of you supported him - and thank you!)

Today - we as a family - were there to see him through to the finish line!  And when I mean "we" I mean Rowan, Natalie and Kiwi (less than two weeks old mind you - meaning I was less than two weeks post partum.  A miracle in and of itself). 

We waited at various pit stops on the 26.2 mile course - with his favorite at Clark street - to cheer him on with signs, high fives and a hug from me/kiss from Kiwi.




Watching our man progress through the race was so much fun (and tiring)!  We were not alone (crowded it was with other family and friends rooting others along)!

The smile on our face had us pushing on to the next pit stop and eventually to the finish line!

Girls Solo Trip - out and about

The girls have been bugging me to take their lil brother out for a walk.  We got the stroller out (here is my caveat - I do not believe in strollers.  I actually hate them.  The baby is so much happier near you, being held by you, hearing your heart beat and smelling you.  Flame away) that was generously given to us by a dear friend. 

It's an Uppa stroller - the cadillac of strollers as I understand.  To me it looks like a Pram - and somehow a Pram is much better than a stroller. 

I had nursed him asleep and he was bundled up and set.  The girls wanted to walk around the block, as if they were "Babysitting" with mama out of the picture. 

I took a deep breath, instructed them to stay on the sidewalk, no crossing streets, no crazy speeds and avoidance of bumps.

I also made the swear they would get along AND carry their cell phones. 

I wish I could say my girls got along, apparently there was a power struggle on who would push and who would wave.....

But in the end - they had a blast wheeling Kiwi around in the Pram and gave mom a few minutes of silence.

Oddly - I felt out of place without my lil man.  Upon their return, despite the fact he was still snoozing, I scooped him up to snuggle with till he woke for his next feeding.

Life does not get better than this........

Official Pictures - aka Kiwi's Modeling Debut

The official pictures were taken yesterday, at the hospital, and I started crying as soon as I saw them.

  The pictures taken at the hospital have come a long way.

It's hard to believe that they were one step below school pictures when you see what they have evolved to.

And, in my opinion, it was a long time coming.

Better yet - they are digital!

Woot - wish school pictures were digital to expedite the order, improve the picture you get and make it possible for you to order AFTER the picture is taken.

So - the long and short of it - since I apparently dropped my brain in the delivery room and no one has found it yet - our baby boy is beautiful and the perfect gift from God.

It's a BOY!

After 18 plus hours (more than that actually but we fibbed a little to take the pressure off my normally long labors) Cillian Edward Mobley made his appearance into this world!

Cillian Edward Mobley at 2135 on 9/202011

In the words of my husband, with that final push, "it's a boy - and he's perfect!"

Perfect indeed he is!

Weighing in at 4.012 KG he every gram a boy!

We were blessed by a wonderful mid-wife, a great tag team of two doulas and a caring primary nurse.  The girls were there for the entire labor and in the end Natalie became the rock that got me through transition and to completion (while she will lead you to believe that her hand is still numb from my squeezing).  

I don't think this is something that any of us will forget for a long time.

Praise God for his continued Grace and Mercy

Another Miracle

As many of you know, the baby was discovered to be Breech (leading me to believe that this lil guy is a guy cause a girl would stop and ask for directions on the proper way out) last week leaving us with choices that were not on my list of delivery options. 

Today - at the bright hour of 0800 - my hubby and prego self trek'd on down to the OB unit at the hospital for an external version.  I had tried to prepare myself for a crash c-section, successful version but induced labor or worse - a planned c-section d/t failed version.  (A granola nut tree hugging woman like me with two water births under her belt and a combined total of 4 years of breast feeding was not digging these options). 

There was a great deal of prayer going on in my house this weekend not to mention breech exercises and some humor provided by my girls.  At one point I was laying with my feet in the air, on my bed, in the privacy (insert British accent) of my room, with Peter Gabriel playing at the pubic area and me massaging the baby towards the head down position, and in walked my lil Ro with her minions to stare at me.  I heard one minion say "what's you mom doing" to which my reply was "trying to flip the baby - Rowan - please leave and shut the door." 

The girls drew lovely lil arrows on my belly directing the baby to the head down position along with hearts and flowers and notes of love (this was the most wonderful thing they could have done to support me than anything else).  

My hubby tried to do his best to support me but I could tell he was struggling to understand all that was concerning and upsetting to me (bless his heart).

 We even did the casting of my belly - for fear that this would be the last weekend it was mommy and baby as opposed to mom and baby "insert girl or boy."   I spent several alone minutes rubbing the belly, talking to my baby and praying I could give up control to God and relax. 

We took many bump pictures and resolved ourselves that this was the last night as a family expecting. 

Which brings me to this morning......

What's that you ask?????

That's a head - yup a head!

PRAISE GOD - a beautiful head in the HEAD DOWN position!

Did I mention this was BEFORE the version?

Yup - BEFORE the version!

this baby - smarter than you can imagine - by the Grace of God - flipped.  He (or she) FLIPPED on his (or her) own!!!!

Ok, this is where I tell you that I:

a. didn't believe it and asked for three different US looks

b. knew exactly when it happened after it was confimred

and.....

c.  CRIED - tears of joy, tears of faith and tears of anxiety leaving my body

Praise God for his continued Grace, Faithfulness and Control 

Happy Mother's Day!

Today was a very low keyed Mother's Day.  I tried to keep it low key as my husband is still mourning the loss of his mom over a year ago. 

To me - the greatest Gift from God was my girls and the most recent gift of my pregnancy. 

I could ask for nothing more.

Today - pleasantly surprised - the girls came home from their social outing to tell us they were joining us for Church because:

1. They didn't want to miss Church
2. It's mom's day

While I was shocked and thought that they would be exhausted it was also quite an honor to have Natalie, my oldest, join me in church today.  Her youth group, which meets on Sunday at 0900, does not meet at the 1100 service so her place was with us.  It was a very special treat.  (And a huge show of where she is in her Christian Faith walk.)

For dinner we had grilled beets, asparagus and caprese salad.  YUM  Ok - there was a crock pot full of spare ribs but I just can't tolerate meat, still.  But - the veggies hit a home run! 

For desert Rowan (my sidekick) and I walked briskly to Trader Joes to get a flourless chocolate cake and malt ball cookies. 

Now - I want to chill out, knit and try to mentally prep myself for the beginning of the work week.....

Sigh.....

For now it's good to reflect on the gift of motherhood that I am so very thankful for!

Praise God!

Park Message today - Why do we work?

The girls - with their social life that I live vicariously through - are at a sleepover tonight.  The dear hubby and I had a date night.  He suffered through a night with his prego wife who had strange food aversions such as "nothing that is edible tastes good or looks good." 

We used our Groupon coupon to Barrio and decided we were glad it was a groupon coupon.  Sigh - while the food was different and they gave nice little portions, the service lacked a lot!  I had the opportunity to visit the bathroom (d/t the pea size of my bladder that the silly baby seems to think is his water bed) three times from appetizer to desert and wished I had before we left.  That was how long dinner dragged out.  Perhaps God was trying to get us to enjoy the time alone together - all a part of his master plan that we totally ignored. 

We came home to look over the Message from Park Church for Sunday, knowing we would enjoy the service to ourselves with our kids away.

I really liked this short theme - it has me thinking deeply about what work means to me.  I wish I could say I enter every work week with a renewed sense of purpose but find myself longing for something better as soon as I am five minutes into the Monday work day.  While work does give me a sense of purpose and I enjoy what I do - minor (and some major things) often irritate me so that I am not who I should be.  Sigh - I have a lot of work to do on this front. 

Ecclesiastes 1:3 :: Your Work Matters to God, Pt. 2

Ecclesiastes 1:3 ESV
What does man gain by all the toil at which he toils under the sun?

Ecclesiastes 2:10-11 :: Your Work Matters to God

Ecclesiastes 2:10-11 ESV
And whatever my eyes desired I did not keep from them. I kept my heart from no pleasure, for my heart found pleasure in all my toil, and this was my reward for all my toil. Then I considered all that my hands had done and the toil I had expended in doing it, and behold, all was vanity and a striving after wind, and there was nothing to be gained under the sun.

What does work mean for you?   

Eco Easter Egg Decor

Today the girls dabbled in the Easter Art of "Egg Dying."  I have always hated Egg dying because it seems as if the eggs always have minute cracks and the dye seeps in contaminating the eggs.  I know that PAAS is supposed to be safe but it just never seemed "RIGHT."

Rowan found this at WholeFoods last week when we were off buying groceries.

The first thought that crossed my mind was "How Brilliant" (insert Brittish accent) and the second thought was how expensive?

I know that sounds jaded but, in general, organic, non-toxic, green, natural, eco-freindly products tend to have a higher price tag.

We were pleasantly surprised by the relatively equivalent price to the PAAS and factored in the
 cost of the eggs that we would have to trash because the unfriendly ECO dye would have created
 meant that we were actually getting a better bargain for the price.

I just loved the packaging as well.  I am a big sucker for packaging.  It kind of goes with whole - presentation is everything.  Make it look good, organized, cute, adorable, professional, shiny, etc you can pretty much have a less than perfect product.

So - as we opened the cute dye kit we wondered - would it stand up to the cuteness and create safe adorable colored eggs??????

It got two thumbs up from the girls......

The only downside is that amount of time it takes for each egg to be dyed.

In this age of instant gratification we want everything to take mere minutes.  In order for the eggs to shine their brightest they needed

As little as 10 minutes in the dye and up to 20 minutes for some of the colors.

So - they read between each plop of the egg.....

The really cool thing was the color card that had them experimenting with how long, which cross dye and wiping the egg for special effects.......

The finished product?????

Turned out quite nice if Rowan does say so herself......

Happy Easter!!!

Christ is Risen!!

Sad day in Holland

This week we took a trip to Holland, MI.  We love it there.  It's such a cute lil college town with tons of biking lanes/paths and five biking stores.  There are two knitting stores and a really quaint coffee shop that we would hang at every morning and evening. 

This year - we were saddened by the Magic Treehouse bookstore joining the long trend of indie book stores closing. 

We walked up and down the street, cobble stone sidewalks et al, looking for the book store only to come to the place where the Treehouse bookstore used to be.  Yes, USED to be.  Apparently it closed last August. 

The girls and I were bummed.  We were looking forward to picking out a book to read during the torrential down pours, snow, sleet, hail and ice storms we were plagued by.

SIGH

I own a Kindle, an IPod and a Nook color.  I hope to, some day, own an ipad (holding out for generation 4).  I enjoy reading on those devices and so does my one daughter and husband.  HOWEVER, this does not dismiss the advantages of walking into a book store, walking the aisles, reviewing the titles and taking in the smell of new books.  

I live to find an indie bookstore, search the shelves, find a book that peaks my interest and hang out reading it in the local coffee shop.  This is a trait I have passed on to my daughters.  It's as satisfying, as if not more, than finding the LYS in a town we are visiting and getting a skein of sock yarn to "knit a sock from that town."  

A friend lamented it was the sign of the times, economy and ebooks, but I think it's our priorities and shift in decisions we make that have led to the rapid demise of our local indie book stores. 

Crock potting mom.....

Apple Sauce chicken - from - you guessed it - Stephanie O'dea.  The girls are asking for bigger salads each night.  Not sure if this is a reflection of my cooking or they really like the salads with dinner.  We can't have a dinner with out salad now. 

This dinner got a "eh - it's okay...." 

I can't win them all - at least we are having dinner together every night....

Will get better in about two weeks when I start my new position...  yipee!

Dinner tonight - Pot Roast and Cranberries - brought to you by Stephanie O'Dea

I altered the dish slightly -

• she mentioned that it was a dry roast - so I doubled the red wine which added immensely to the flavor.
• I changed out the cranberries for cherries - which is supposed to be "good" for a person in my condition
• added carrots to the pot as a side veggies which made yummy carrots.

The verdict- 3 out of the 5 of us (baby included) gave it thumbs up.  I have no appetite right now - and especially meat.  I made the pot roast because my hubby thinks that every night should be a meat night.  Me - if I had meat once a year I would be happy.

However  - I think this one will be going on the "make again list and don't alter."

Cheeres!

Running on a treadmill....

I feel like I am running on a treadmill! 

My bible readings, prayer time and alone time is suffering.

Thank GOD the baby is moving now or I would forget I was preggers.... 

Work is closing in and I am not coping well. 

I feel like a failure with my kids - one more dinner plopped in the crock pot today - Baked Zita - with a huge veggie twist (shhhhhhh  they don't need to know there are carrots, zucchinni, cauliflower or squash).  It will be done by lunch and they can snack on it till dinner.  They are home from school and I have parent teacher conference that I smidged in between two meetings - one having me run back to work at a high rate of speed. 

I love living in Chicago - everything is centralized - but at times I feel more frazzled trying to get from point a to point b. 

I will be so glad when 4/16 is here - I am going to plop myself in bed and not get out till the 17th - when we leave on a mini vacay of sorts.

I feel like such a slug and failure.  I have, however, retreated to a quiet room to read prologue from Park. 

I just want to know how I lost control of my time and my commitments?  How does this happen?  How do I prevent it?

Non-Productive

I feel so non-productive today.  I am in a daze.  It's kinda like I am walking in a fog. 

I feel like the only thing I did productive today is start dinner in the crock pot before leaving for work. 

Thank goodness for a year of slow cooking!  Today's dinner - Apricot Chicken and rice. 

I am hoping this turns out better than the root beer pulled pork fiasco.  I almost bought real root beer today - but then I would have to hide it from my children who think root beer is their "treat" since we don't push pop or kool aide in our house.  We have a boring house I am afraid - water and soy milk. 

I am  really anal about what they eat in my home - cause I can control that.  I tell them - if I tightly control what they eat at home (I figure about 80% of the food they eat) then I can let the parties, sleep overs and get to gethers go (the 20% I can't control). 

With that said - I did not buy the root beer but put the recipe on the calender about three weeks from now....  Way after Easter.

UGH - Easter - what am I going to do for Easter dinner!!!!!

Mystery Knit

Ok - Mama confession......

I spent some time at work trying to get things done.... and was feeling really stressed. 

I ran away....  Sad I know.  I just went downtown to fondle some yarn, looking for nothing in particular, but had a couple of patterns in my bag.  Let me clarify - I ran away because of stress from work - not because I don't want to be a mommy. 


 I decided to start this knit - a Mystery Knit - because it peaked my interest - a bit of the pattern every few days?


Of course - it's in purple - using mixed purple beads since the yarn is a variation of purples.

I now remember why I do not like to knit with beads - the stringing of the beads.


As it was - I also ran to Michael's so that Rowan could have supplies she needed for school (pom poms, craft paper, sock yarn, seed beads).  Ok, so maybe the last two were not supplies for Rowan by supplies for mama.......



But rest assured - I had things under control.  Nat and Rowan were set up with two movies from Netflix, including books to read, and dinner was in the crock pot.  I was an EL ride away or a brisk walk if needed (and apparently my butt is needing it lately).

Dinner was from  Stephanie O'Dea at A Year of Slow Cooking.  Our family loves her ideas for recipes in the crock pot. 
Tonight was the root beer pulled pork.  Consensus was simply blah.  I think, had I used real root beer, as opposed to diet, it would have been a little better.  We agreed to do a second round of it in a few weeks. 

Me - not much of a meat eater - so wasn't impressed.  With the baby - still not a meat eater.

What I am reading now.....

I strive to be a good mom, pleasing and disciplining enough 80% of the time. I feel I miss the mark alot (to be quite honest with you).

I just picked up this book - or rather downloaded it on my ENook.

The author lives in Illinois and has a Chicago Flair to her writing.  I can totally relate to her.  I am slowly reading each chapter.  I take a break after a chapter to reflect and really digest all that she is saying.  I find this book refreshing and guiding.  I find this restores my desire to be the best mom God created me to be as well as hope that he will guide me there if I just stop, take a breath and listen to him. 

Praise God

Most wonderful Evening

If you ask a dozen of my friends, a dozen of my colleagues and my family - if I was a work-a-holic they would simply tell you "most definitely!"

Sad I know......

Yesterday I did the most uncharacteristic thing for a Monday and for me.  I sped out of a meeting and met a dear friend from Michigan and her sons, friends and my family.  We had wings at Wild Goose.  Okay - I must admit my hubby was right - not the best choice for the lime and I - but it was so nice to get out on a Monday (I felt decadently evil and a huge slacker at that).  I didn't even think about work for two hours.  I had an appetite AND I had fun.  The after effects of hot wings - not so good - but all worth it!

Note to self - must do this more often.

My baby girls all grown up!

Natalie and Rowan were invited to a Bat Mitvah this weekend and that means "dressy dresses mom!"

Natalie is my budding baby who needs to slow down in growing up.  Her dad is having a hard time with her grown up appearance.  I find her quite breath taking......

Rowan - while cute and dressed up - is STILL my baby girl!




Sigh... they grow up so fast!!!!!